Friday, September 10, 2010

My Sister's Keeper

My Sister’s Keeper in my humble opinion was an amazing movie. It was also a very emotional movie. We have another family in our community that had a child, a daughter, die from leukemia few years back. Watching this movie brought back all the emotions of watching from the outside as Michelle died. It also brought to the surface all the emotions of having a child who will have a life long disability. Honestly how do you decide who has the better life? Part of me wishes Austin had 15 years of normal, hell I would give almost anything for any part of normal. I would give up all the poop smears, the pain he didn’t feel, but still went through, the not knowing us, not understanding, the entire process of getting here to experience one day of normal, one day of Austin being a typical 9 year old. Then I have the other part of me that feels selfish. How dare I want that when there are so many parents who just wish their child was alive.

Who is right in this? Honestly no one, how can you be? It is a no win situation, all the emotions are valid and none are better or worse then the others. We are all mothers, all parents of children who need help, we are all parents fighting for our kids but what really defines who has more pain? I honestly do not know. It is like the old saying “It is better to love and lost then to never loved at all”, right? Well that would imply that the parent of the child who died was better off, but is that right? Is that correct? I will probably never know the answer and will probably always wonder.

The thing I learned from the movie My Sister’s Keeper, is the thing I already knew. A mother will do anything for her child, she will fight forever for her kid and hell has no fury like a mother scorned. I did also learn that maybe we need to listen to our children, maybe ask what they want from this life. This also leads to huge issues for me like it did for the family in the movie. No one actually asked the child who was sick what they wanted and no one asked the child who was expected to help the child who was sick.

(SPOILER BELOW: if you are going to watch the movie abort now, STOP READING NOW!!!)

I was surprised that the daughter was doing what the sick daughter wanted. I honestly thought she was doing it to just make her parents ask her, her opinion. Of course, I might project my feeling of what I think my 10, 18, and 20 year old think on to things. I am not sure they always tell me all they think on the subject. Hopefully after reading this they are a little more open to discussing it, and hopefully by watching this movie I am a little more opening to listening and hearing what they have to say.

Until next time PITAup and do something to change the life of a child with Autism, the life you change maybe your own!!!

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