Is it wrong to some days just hate your friends who do not have a child with Autism? Because right now I hate you all equally, as my mom used to say about me and my siblings.
Ok not because I hate you, I hate the fact that you can worry about such trivial things like wither or not your kid is getting into the right school, or camp, summer camp, or can even go to camp or if its your vacation to some exotic place I can only dream of going!!!
Honestly, my older kids dream about not working through college, they dream of a life without $50k in student loans they dream about a day that they may not be responsible for their sibling with Autism and they wish their parents could afford to pay their college tuition or take them on a cruise or to Europe, Emily dreams about an over night camp. My husband dreams of vacations far from Carlsbad. I dream of a weekly massage and unlimited shopping trips, but hey I am easy, lol.
Unfortunately that is not our life!!
Ok maybe it’s been a bad day, a really bad day!
Just because my special ed director decided to leave our district right as I hit my period and just one week before the 6 anniversary of Austin’s diagnoses, and I have to worry about the fact that a day camp for Austin can cost $1000 to $2000 a week, and that this is really the rest of my life.
I guess I am not sure why I am surprised by my negative reaction to everything (yes that is sarcasm).
I guess today is the day that I am not little miss sunshine, lollipops and life is good.
I really try. I know how far Austin and our family has come but some days you just have to say it!!
Today sucks. Autism sucks!!!
The one person in Carlsbad Unified School District that actually had the power to make a difference has left. His supervisor ended his message to the teachers about his departure with this ominous message, “We began talking this afternoon in executive cabinet about how best to fill this incredibly important position in these tight financial times.”
I honestly wish Bruce well, but I am so sad by him leaving. It breaks my heart and makes me want to go back to the crazy parent I was 5 years ago when Bruce met me. Chances are I will, but there is a small part of me that hopes that Dr. Roach is right when he said, “He has helped us “right the ship” in services to Special Education students. We have made tremendous progress in the five years Bruce has led that division.”
I guess if nothing else Bruce gave me hope. Well here to me PITAing up and keeping the hope.
Ok not because I hate you, I hate the fact that you can worry about such trivial things like wither or not your kid is getting into the right school, or camp, summer camp, or can even go to camp or if its your vacation to some exotic place I can only dream of going!!!
Honestly, my older kids dream about not working through college, they dream of a life without $50k in student loans they dream about a day that they may not be responsible for their sibling with Autism and they wish their parents could afford to pay their college tuition or take them on a cruise or to Europe, Emily dreams about an over night camp. My husband dreams of vacations far from Carlsbad. I dream of a weekly massage and unlimited shopping trips, but hey I am easy, lol.
Unfortunately that is not our life!!
Ok maybe it’s been a bad day, a really bad day!
Just because my special ed director decided to leave our district right as I hit my period and just one week before the 6 anniversary of Austin’s diagnoses, and I have to worry about the fact that a day camp for Austin can cost $1000 to $2000 a week, and that this is really the rest of my life.
I guess I am not sure why I am surprised by my negative reaction to everything (yes that is sarcasm).
I guess today is the day that I am not little miss sunshine, lollipops and life is good.
I really try. I know how far Austin and our family has come but some days you just have to say it!!
Today sucks. Autism sucks!!!
The one person in Carlsbad Unified School District that actually had the power to make a difference has left. His supervisor ended his message to the teachers about his departure with this ominous message, “We began talking this afternoon in executive cabinet about how best to fill this incredibly important position in these tight financial times.”
I honestly wish Bruce well, but I am so sad by him leaving. It breaks my heart and makes me want to go back to the crazy parent I was 5 years ago when Bruce met me. Chances are I will, but there is a small part of me that hopes that Dr. Roach is right when he said, “He has helped us “right the ship” in services to Special Education students. We have made tremendous progress in the five years Bruce has led that division.”
I guess if nothing else Bruce gave me hope. Well here to me PITAing up and keeping the hope.
What is this ~Vacation~ you speak of? HaHa
ReplyDeleteWe all feel like you do today sometimes. Being truthful, we have very few friends left outside of Autism. They fade away, as does family. Oh family will keep in touch by phone but in person visits? Not so much. One side of the family has not been to visit us in 7 years. Some on my side 3-4 years. Oh well.
As for your Special Ed director leaving, it is awful when they have their own damned lives isn't it? But keep in mind, all of the things that have been set into place while he was there. It will be very difficult for those things to be taken away from your boy now. It is easier to tell a family no than it is to try and take a service that is working away. I have no doubt that any new person will meet a strong PITA and see that you will advocate for your boy! You are not that wounded bird you were when Austin was first diagnosed! Keep your chin up and smile! At least until you get your period again next month!
Your older kids don't blame you for the college expenses. As they get older you will see how much respect they have for all you have done for their little brother.
Thanks for being a great Warrior Mom Example for so many!!
OK I heard a rumor just yesterday that Bruce was leaving but didn't want to say anything to you because of what happened last time! This is most distressing. We'll have to work together to whip the next director into shape and fast!!
ReplyDeleteAny idea where Bruce is going, btw?